East or West, Grandparents are the Best

Grandmother and grandfather are words that are becoming scarce. It is not that they don’t exist but today’s children are denied an access to the store of wisdom that can come to them through these wise, old people. We can blame the breaking up of joint families for this but the fact remains that unitary families are losing wealth of knowledge.

I consider myself fortunate to have the blood of the Aryans and the Dravidians. So I have got the best of both the races. If the Aryans have the Vedic tradition, the Dravidians have their ethnic identity, culture and tradition.

Hence I would venture to narrate all that my grandmothers shared with me. Both my grannies from the paternal and maternal sides were staunch Hindus Brahmins, with orthodox religious base. My paternal grandma was an Oriya Brahmin and my maternal grandma was a Telugu Brahmin.

My Dadi i.e. paternal Grand mom had great practical wisdom. It was said that once she rescued my Dad from sure death, from a deadly cobra bite by tying a rope above and below the affected leg of my Dad. Later on, my Grandpa, who was an L.M.P. Doctor, did the needful to revive my Dad fully but he praised my Granny’s practical wisdom.

There are many incidents that my grandma narrates. It would be a book if I put all that into words here. Yet some are very interesting to find a place here.

She would often teach me lessons on tolerance. She used to say, “The problems of life and waves of sea can be faced if you bend your head and tolerate them. Nothing in life is intolerable or insurmountable. And life is like the wheel of a bullock cart. There are ups and downs of life. We need to face both these extremes to live our lives. If there are good times, we must remember that “This too shall pass” as nothing is permanent in this ever changing world.”

What lessons of life and what philosophies she had! She explained to me the meaning of life which no book would ever teach or preach!!

She could make many traditional dishes of Orissa which had the touch of ethnic origin. It ranged from several curries, fried stuff, leafy delicacies and sweet dishes galore! The yummy taste of those dishes still tickle my taste buds, whenever I think of them in fond memories of my paternal grandma.

Giving hint to our forgetfulness and memory, she used to say, “Remember, there are four categories of people among the entire humanity. Some people Remember Fast and Forget Fast. They belong to the first type. The second category of people, Remember Fast and Forget Late. The third category of people Remember Late and Forget Late. The fourth and last type of people Remember Late and Forget Fast. The last type of people are the worst and the best are of course the second category of people.”

As a young and unwilling child, I would often feel reluctant to study and learn something. So she would encourage me with a precept: “Thieves can take away your money and property but they can’t take away your knowledge and wisdom. So learn and increase the knowledge as much as possible. It will keep you in a good stead.”

The numerous stories that she used to narrate had great wisdom and moral. The brave characters from Ramayan and Mahabharat often came alive and inspired me to face boldly. The fairy tales had their own influence on my young mind. They tickled my imagination and created instincts. Every character had his or her importance. Some of them could fly; others had superhuman strength and yet others could become invisible or travel in the air as they wished!

There were no TVs and computers those days. But at the advent of TV in her last days, she became an addict to TV and she preferred to sit glued to the TV even though no interesting programme.

She used to get up early in the morning and start her religious rituals after a bath with cold water, throughout the year. She remembered many Sanskrit shlokas and prayers and would recite them loudly. She would wake me up to study early during my examinations…….

But this never happened with my Nani, the maternal grandmother. She had many other qualities which were unique. She could cook South Indian dishes to perfection. She believed in age-old principle of “Go Slow” or, better to say, “Slow and steady wins the race.” She would do everything slowly but perfectly. She was perfectionist.

It was a joy to see her spotless white saree worn in south Indian style. She had an ever-smiling face and would often laugh and make others smile. I could never feel tired of the number of times she narrated the story of Ramayan. And every time she insisted that it had to be completed.

It would be incomplete if I don’t mention about her skill in kitchen. She could cook all dishes with perfection. But she needed more oil, sugar and cooking ingredients. Yet she was matchless in cuisine. She was very patient to serve them and wait on people to taste her dishes.

Different courses of meal used to be served in South Indian style, like pulses and rice, oil and rice course, sambhar and rice course and curd and rice course or milk and rice course. She would insist everyone she serves to eat the food almost like a ritual! Her sweet dishes were the best.

So I was lucky to have the two grannies, who had a lasting impression on me. How I wish my son could get this privilege. None other could replace the GRAND PARENTS!!!!!!....

Sanjay Kumar Mishra
WhatsApp# +919981411674
Department of English
Rajkumar College, Raipur
Chhattisgarh, India